You Have to Break The Ties with Your Most Intimate Friend If You Want to Live a Deeply Satisfying Life.
Ego has to go.
Running out of gas sucks.
Last night I told myself, “Get gas on the way to school.”
This morning I forgot.
I started to feel the panic. The rush of stress hormones.
My kid instantly joined in my anxiety. “What are you going to do Mom!?”
I’m thinking “I’m going to be stranded in the middle of the road! And all the carpool parents are going to be judging me, the mom in the dirty pop-top van. And they’ll all be pissed because I’m blocking their way to get their kid to school so they can go off to a job they hate. And I’ll have to get out of the car and walk to the gas station. And I didn’t even wear a bra this morning!”
I responded “I’m going to connect with the present moment and pull in all the intensity behind the emotion and feed that to my inner being.”
So I did. I made it to the gas station on fumes.
Crappy emotions wake us up.
And as we learn to untangle the gem of the intensity from the situation, we have a power source that feeds our connection to our soul.
Eventually, we no longer need the intense emotions to wake us up.
We will be living awake. We will be experiencing life through a higher vibration.
Meanwhile the gaps between the spiked emotions feel pretty flat.
Gratitude is mostly a concept we fake til we make.
Manifestation feels like a desperate attempt to get something we’re lacking.
Dragon in distress
My husband and I have this agreement that if I can go 6 months without burning an unwatched pot on the stove we can get a new set of cooking pots. This has been going on for years. The copper is burned through on most of our cookware.
Our dinner bell is the smoke alarm going off. Some folks work hard to get this kind of seasoning. To me it comes naturally.
I’ve always been pretty hot headed. Reactive to the outside world. Constantly trying to control and fix it so it lines up and I can feel safe and happy. That’s probably why burning dinner is my expertise. All that repressed fire in me.
I’m practicing letting it out in healthier ways. Feeding the fire to my spirit instead of breathing it out like an untamed dragon.
I’m planning on getting that new set of cookware this year. Maybe for my birthday in February.
Build it and they will come
I carry a heavy dose of mother’s guilt.
Feeling guilt for not being the perfect mother for our kids. Wanting to be further along on the road to Enlightenment so I can pass on the wisdom of living an amazing life to our kids.
I’ve been chipping away at it for years. Peeling back the layers. Healing the wounds.
This is the year of taking responsibility. Feeling my power. Telling myself “I can.”
We went to eat dinner with a family we adore. They live in a tiny home. The thing I love about tiny home living is it forces you to be outside.
When we got home I realized our child was upset because they felt left out of the bonfire games. I was giving them a hug at bedtime and I felt this merging of energy I haven’t felt much before. It’s like the edges of who I am melted away.
I realized the best thing we can do for our kids is hold the energy. Hold the vibration. The higher frequency of life. They are so receptive to who we are being, they’ll get it.
Like “Build it and they will come.”
“Be it and they will join.” And if they don’t fully join yet, it will plant a seed and give them a connection point they can come home to when they are ready.
Making it easier for them to find the path to come home to their inner being.
Please have a drink
You can lead a horse to water but you can’t make him drink.
But you can hook him up to an IV drip of normal saline so he doesn’t get dehydrated.
This is what tough love is. It’s a battle with the Ego. And it feels crushing to the other person because we identify as our Ego.
We have to be willing to give and receive tough love if we want to overcome our Ego driven lives. Where our hopes of happiness are pointed out. At the people or events or jobs or circumstances or financial status or health.
It’s so hard for us to accept that the way we go through this life with Fulfillment and Joy and Peace and Purpose is from the inside out.
The veil that keeps us from seeing our true self is more like a wool army blanket.
Tough love helps lift this suffocating veil.
We need to toss that itchy heavy thing to an upcycle Etsy artist and see what creative masterpiece they can make of it.
Final Thoughts
We have to drop below the surface of managing life the way we do.
Real transformation happens when we decide to step fully into the all-day, in our face, rewiring. One event after another. One interaction or confrontation at a time. Sometimes with others. Always with our own internal chaos.
We have to stop taking direction from our most intimate friend, Ego. It takes courage to approach the challenges of the day from a different angle. Thanks for the years of protection Ego! You can relax now. We brought True Power on board.
As we start to see the outline of the door to living life from a more expanded place, we begin to feel different. More frequently.
Worry and anxiety and fear and regret are lifted.
We begin to feel a calm that is the Essence of Life.
You’ll know you've found this special place when you're lacking words to explain it.
Please tell us how you find your way to feeling connected in the comments. We don’t realize what a ripple effect we have when we share.